Archive for October, 2007

dentally challenged

In Oslo, Ole Danbolt Mjoes, chairman of the peace committee, was asked whether the award could be interpreted as criticism of the Bush administration and the United States, which do not subscribe to the Kyoto treaty to cap greenhouse emissions. He replied that the Nobel was not meant to be a “kick in the leg to anyone” — the Norwegian expression for “kick in the teeth.”

“Honey,” said Olaf, “I think the Wildsteins are here.”

“Just give me a second,” said Helga.  “Oh shit!”

There was a crash in the kitchen.  A pool of reindeer stew began to seep around the door.

“What did you do?” yelled Olaf.

“Oh I…shit.  I tried to taste the stew.”

“Out of the pot?  Nobody can kick that high.”

“I know, I just…”

“Honey, they’re here.

“I know, I know,” snapped Helga.  “Just get the door.  This’ll be all right.”

“Olaf mein freunde!  How are you doing?”

“Oh not so bad Klaus.  Matilde, lovely to see you.  I’m afraid Helga had a little accident with the soup.  Do sit down.”

“I can help with anything, no?” asked Matilde.

“No, no, don’t worry about it.  She’ll be right in a minute.  She tried to taste the stew but she isn’t as limber as she used to be.”

“I keep forgetting!” said Klaus.  “Of course, you Norwegians eat through your legs.  It must get difficult if you are as stiff as I am.”

Olaf smiled thinly.

“I mean, I don’t–” Klaus began, “I didn’t mean to give you a kick in the teeth–I MEAN, sorry, leg.  SORRY–“